She

When I last saw you, you were getting out of the car in London. I was on my way to the airport, indeed to my new life. That seemed... it, but it really wasn't.

Our relationship - or rather lack of it - is the most mysterious I've ever had. I simply don't get it. Why did I like you so much... better yet, why do I miss you so much?

You are undoubtedly comparable to a cat - sometimes very close, sometimes so, so distant.

I remember vividly what you were wearing when I last saw you: jeans, denim jacket, tennis shoes... the cool casual look. Gorgeous as always. You still don't believe me when I tell you are incredibly cute, do you?

I remember your intrinsic beauty - the one you might feel you don't have... but believe me you do - but I also remember something else: the last two times we met, I felt that you were abandoning yourself in me more... not totally, but more. Was it because I was leaving or was it because that was where our pseudo-relationship was taking us?

Probably, I will never know.

A real huge kiss from far, far away and... I do miss you!

Sometimes...

Sometimes, just sometimes... I wish I was a bit less self-centered. On the one hand, it helps me cope with life, keep a happy spirit and move on, but it has really made me reasonably insensitive to whatever happens around me.

Not sure I really want to write more on this post... sorry for that.

Note: I thought about posting this a long time ago and always hesitated - finally did on Sep 14th. Don't really know why it took me so long. As for my "hopeful" wish, let's just say it didn't materialize ... and that's actually good, since I've dramatically changed my opinion on the "cool, distant girl"... Wait a sec, I think I actually like her.

The hours that did follow

Well, well… you’ve come a long way mate.

Two girls: one sexy from here to kingdom come, moving like there was no tomorrow, distant… but sexy distant… most probably following the "cool, yet distant" standard; the other girl… prissy, cute … Christian… wow.

Who do you go for?

Well, I have to say the day started with me going for the former, but something happened. I changed my mind somehow when I started talking to the second girl. She just… made me feel better.

I had one of those strange moments where everything stood still, like nothing was around us. This happened in the middle of a club with loud music that made our conversation oh so much more difficult! Yet, it was all so still. My heart went at its normal speed as if I got immersed in a feeling of re-assurance, of … belonging. That was it: I belonged there … in that moment… with that person. I don’t know, maybe I saw too much into that moment, into that conversation. It has happened before after all… but what if this time it’s different?

I sure hope so.